I Found My Heart In San Francisco
by Cypher
Summary: Daniel is dragged to San Francisco by Jack, and discovers the love of his life feels the same way he does. Not as corny as the title implies (it's all I could think of). R for language and homosexual situations.


**I Found my Heart in San Francisco**

_By Cypher_

__

Why am I here again? What on Earth possessed me to come to this cold and crowded town? Why am I wasting my time here, at this stupid fund raiser, when I could be back at the base working on the latest writings from P3X-595? 

Because He asked me to be here. Him. Jack O'Neill. Damn bastard. He knows I can't say no to him. Sure, he can't order me what to do, but he knows I won't refuse an offer from him, either. Especially when he threatens to get Janet to write a notice to the General saying that I need time off. 

I snort and grab another glass of champagne. I don't need time off. I LIKE working in my cramped office, pouring over ancient texts and rediscovering cultures once thought dead. But Jack doesn't understand that. He doesn't get me on so many levels. 

Carter understands. She's a lot like me. She'd rather be in her lab than here in this horrible, albeit, gorgeous building. I'm surprised Jack didn't ask her to come instead of me. He can order her, though she'd probably resent him a lot more than I do right now. 

I resent him for dragging me away, but I do get to share a room with the man, which is always a perk. He says he wanted me along because he didn't have to get an extra room. That was his excuse to leave out Carter. On the flight, yes flight, over, while I was napping (okay, okay, I had to be sedated), I dreamed that he wanted me to come, to share a room with me, for more intimate reasons. Then he nudged me with his shoulder, waking me from my pleasant slumber, and said something about medications and my sex drive. 

The stewardess had laughed at how red I had turned, but he wasn't far off from the truth. Whenever I get really drugged up, my inhibitions are released and I tend to dream of my Colonel, holding me, kissing me, and from time to time, making love to me. 

Yeah, I'm bisexual. I don't think the military has figured it out, or if they have they decided that I was too valuable to do anything about it. I've known since I was eighteen, and experimented a bit. I tended to lean towards women, but every now and then this...guy would come along and I couldn't stop myself from asking him out. 

When I was brought into the Stargate project, I had to suppress my sexuality. It helped that initially, most of the men I worked with had no intellectual interest to me. In some respects Jack doesn't, either. In others, though, there's something about him that I just can't explain. He knows Shakespeare like no other, and the way his mind can find ways out of situations...there's definitely an intelligence. 

On Abydos, I met my wife, though, and while Jack remained in the back of my mind, my heart belonged to her. Until she was taken by that creep Apophis. Then Jack came back into my life, and my feelings for him returned. I've managed to keep them suppressed, even when we share a tent on other worlds. Problem is, I don't know how long I can keep up the facade any more. 

And now I'm in San Francisco, sharing a room with the man of my dreams, and attending this ridiculous fund raiser for something or other. I was too upset about being dragged along, and distracted by Jack in his tux, that I missed what exactly this party was for. Whatever it was for, though, they certainly picked a great place. 

San Francisco City Hall. 

They've just renovated it. There's gold leaves on the ceiling (real gold, I've heard), murals that would put Michelangelo to shame, and architecture that just screams an artist designed the place. I spent a good thirty minutes exploring the main hall alone, just taking in the majesty of it all. 

Then, of course, Jack drags me to the west room, where speeches are being made. He's not making one, and neither am I. Small favors, there. I ate the prepaid dinner, a bit bland for my tastes, but what can you expect in a government building? When Jack left to get a drink, I, guiltily I might add, snuck away to the east room, where some of the building's and city's history, was on display. Granted, United States history is rather dull compared to what I'm used to, but at least it gives me something to do. Unfortunately, others have found their way in here as well, and I fear that an orchestra is gathering in a corner of the room. 

At least this is the only night I'm obligated to be somewhere. Jack insisted that we make this a long weekend. After tonight, I have three nights and four days to do whatever I want, as long as it's in the city. I hate when he acts like my father, though I will admit I'm slightly curious about Chinatown, and Carter wants me to bring some chocolate back from Ghirardelli Square. Teal'c, of all people, made me promise to bring back a few souvenirs from some place he heard about at Pier 39. 

I guess Jack's gonna get his wish of me wanting to see the sights. Then again, if I get my act together, I could finish it all in one day. No matter what that desk clerk said. I thought I'd ask a native at the check-in desk if I could hit all three places in one day. He ended up laughing so hard he had to take a break to recover. But I'm a part of SG-1. If I can take on Goa'uld, cultural difficulties, and alien languages, touring San Francisco shouldn't be TOO difficult. 

"Danny! There you are. I've been looking all over for ya." 

Jack, however, is a whole other story. "I've been right here, Jack." Jack. Even when the others have to call him Colonel, I prefer to call him Jack. Really irks him on missions. He doesn't know how cute he is irked. 

"Bored outta your skull, huh?" He smirks and crosses his arms, looking up at the ceiling. 

I just finish off my drink. I had looked at the ceiling already. Unlike the central chamber, this one had little interest. The model of Alcatraz was more interesting. Ugh, one place Jack wants to go, and he's insisting I go with him. I don't know why anyone would want to see an old prison. Unless, of course, it belonged to an ancient civilization. 

"It's only eight, why don't we hit the town. Union Square isn't too far from here." 

Oh jeeze, it's only been an hour since we got here? Well, let's see, spend the rest of the night here nearly dying from intellectual starvation, or hanging out with Jack. Even if I didn't have any feelings towards him, Jack'd win, no contest. "Let's get outta here." I start towards the door. Is it just me, or has his smirk gotten bigger? Must be the change in lighting. 

~*()*~ 

"You sure you don't wanna go skating, Danny boy?" 

I really wish he wouldn't use the boy name. Sure, I'm almost half his age, but I'm older than him mentally. My boyish looks are very deceiving. I simply shake my head and sit on a bench. I'd rather watch the stars in the sky than ones that would circle my head should I actually try skating. "Just a little tired. And I don't wanna ruin the tux." 

Jack shrugs. Guess he bought it. Within three steps on the ice, though, he falls on his ass. See, THAT'S what I didn't want to happen to me. Taking a deep breath of surprisingly fresh air, I rub my arms and look around. The fog has lifted for the night, so there's a clear view of the sky. I pick out a couple constellations that can't be seen from the mountain. I'd always thought stars from the city wouldn't be visible. I have to say I'm really surprised at how clearly everything can be seen. 

Even though it's early fall, I can see the Macy building starting to put up Christmas decorations. My eyes narrow at the edge of the roof. Is that a giant wreath? I bet it's like New York, they go all out with decorations. I know they do that at Neiman Marcus. It used to be the original City Hall, and every year they put a giant tree in the rotunda. Three stories tall. While City Hall moved, the residents insisted tradition continue, and so every year, the tree goes up again in the rotunda, the only part of the building that used to be a part of the old City Hall. 

See? I know my San Franciscan history. I can know it just as well as Jack. He's been here before, and I doubt he knew about that building. I can see them beginning to construct the base for the tree. I guess it takes a while to get it up, even with modern conveniences. My eyes stray from the store to the ice, picking out Jack easily. He's the only one wind milling his arms and letting out a string of swear words while trying to balance. 

I smile at the sight. In fact, a lot of people are, the ones that don't have to dive out of the way. He's lost his bow tie. Figures. But he still looks cute without it. In fact, I think he looks better. If he's not careful, though, he's gonna have to pay for a brand new suit. 

My eyes roam once more, landing on other benches. Some contain couples, young and old, just sitting there, cuddling, making out, and there's one couple behind the bench across from me that's fallen to the ground and--oh my. My cheeks go red as I quickly look towards the Disney store. 

My heart twists slightly. Right in front of the Disney store are two men. That's not so unusual, but what gets me is that they're holding hands, and one of them is resting his head on the other's shoulder. The taller one, the one who has a head on his shoulder, whispers something, and the two share a quick kiss. Partners. They're partners. 

And no one around them gives a shit. They're acting as if two guys kissing each other in front of a Disney store, a freakin' Disney store, is completely normal. Now that I look around, I catch other couples, and not the traditional type. Two lesbians are sharing a pretzel a la feeding each other, rather sensually. Another guy couple, teenagers, actually, are making out mercilessly only a dozen or so feet away from me. 

And among this brightly lit area, no one cares that these homosexual couples are around. What I wouldn't give for the chance to do that with my Colonel. But I can't. He's military. They frown upon such things, and on top of that, this is Jack O'Neill, the most macho guy on base. He's got half the female staff lusting after him. Granted, so do I, but he flirts whereas I play the oblivious card. 

He's the one who's oblivious, though. To me, my feelings, everything. I've made sure of it. 

He's coming off the ice now. Is he looking at the teenagers and...smiling? Naw, probably just something behind them or thinking about how great a time he had on the ice. He'd never smile at two guys together. And if he ever found out how I felt, he'd never smile again at me. 

~*()*~ 

It's our second day in San Francisco, and I got a none-too-pleasant wake up call at eight. Yes, Jack had brought me coffee, but he DIDN'T have to scream in my ear. I would've gotten up...eventually. Sure, I can be quick to wake up off-world, but when I'm on Earth, I LIKE to sleep in. Sharing a room with him may be great, but I hadn't thought about the disadvantage of having to share with someone set to an internal military clock. 

We had breakfast downstairs, where, to my delight, I find out there's an anime convention in our hotel. YaoiCon. I can't wait to sneak down this evening to see what merchandise they have. I'll admit it, I'm an in-the-closet anime fan. Another thing that the guys would probably tease me about. I don't really have time to watch it, especially now, but I try and catch things every now and then. 

It started with a movie called 'Crystal Triangles' that included archeology, mythology, meaning of life, all that stuff. The SciFi channel was showing a day of anime, and when I saw someone digging in the dirt, I just kinda got ensnared. After that was 'Naussica of the Valley of the Winds,' another great show. It'd probably surprise my friends that I like the depressing genre. 'X' the movie was great, as was 'Noir,' and who could forget 'Grave of the Fireflies'? I have a couple friends recommending the 'Neon Genesis Evangelion' series. I'm hoping that the convention will have a box set of them on DVD or something. 

But that's for tonight. Breakfast was better than the pre-made dinner we had last night, but still, it wasn't that great. I wanted to go straight to Chinatown, but Jack insisted, and I do mean insisted, that we check out Golden Gate Park. And, like a good archeologist that's head over heels for his commanding officer, I agreed, IF we went to Pier 39 afterwards. I wanted to get Teal'c his stuff. So we wandered around the park, even went on the carousel. Jack's face lit up like a kid on that. It went back to normal as soon as it ended, but for a few minutes, I got to see a rare, unguarded side of Jack. 

Walking by the stream was nice, too. I almost forgot who he was and made to grab his hand, to hold it as we walked. He coughed, though, stopping me from creating a potentially embarrassing, and even dangerous, situation. Eventually we ended up at Steinheart Aquarium. Jack wanted to go in, but some info on the art museum across the street convinced me that it would be more interesting to go there. Steinheart was for kids, after all. And, breaking with my usual rule of no touching, I grabbed Jack's arm and practically dragged him to where I wanted to go. 

Of course, when he yelled and yanked his arm back after we arrived, I started to blush. He didn't say anything, thankfully, and took care of the tickets quietly, allowing me to compose myself. We're silent as we go in, and as I examine each and every painting and sculpture, he's patiently waiting for me, simply glancing at things while I stand and stare, and I do mean stare, at some of the pieces. Eventually we get to the room that interested me: an entire three-dimensional sculpture made out of human hair. It's huge. Probably as big as Carter's lab. It's creepy, but at the same time, one has to appreciate just how...beautiful such a thing is, and how much effort went into it. 

Of course, Jack couldn't, and I had to remind him a number of times to keep his hands off, before finally a docent came over and suggest that he put his hands in his pockets. Jack glowered, but did as he was told. I knew he wasn't happy, but that's what you get when you act like a kid in a place filled with treasures. 

After that room, I decide that we best leave. Jack doesn't even nod in agreement, just sets off for the exit. Figures. Art isn't exactly his thing. Maybe we'll do something he likes later. Maybe we could go back to Steinheart later. Or the Exploratorium. I've heard some great things about that place. 

Jack doesn't even slow down his pace, though. He's heading straight back for the car. Ah well. I'm sure something at the Pier will catch his attention. I wonder if I offended him somehow. I mean, sure, art museums aren't exactly exciting, but this is supposed to be a vacation for me, right? Well, for him too, I guess. We should've rented a second car. Or better yet, I should start looking over the public transportation available. Tomorrow I'll give him a day to do what he wants. I'm sure some time apart is exactly what's on his mind. Hanging out with an archeologist can't be that great. 

"Daniel!" 

I wince. I really didn't mean to walk into him, but what the hell is he doing just standing there. Muttering an apology, I back away from him and straighten my glasses. Well, let's see where we are. A lake? We're at a lake? 

"Come on, what do you say we rent a boat?" 

A boat? He wants to go on the lake? He does know he can't fish here, right? But then again, I dragged him to an art museum. This is one way to make it up to him. "Sure, why not." I smile a bit, though it's somewhat difficult. The fog's back, and starting to get through the sweater I had put on this morning. 

"Great, come on." He wraps an arm around my shoulders and leads me towards the docks. Sometimes I wonder if he does know my feelings, and just teases me, like he's doing now. I'm trying not to turn red, and the cold is helping with that, but must he pull me so close to him? Glancing at his face, I think I catch a twinkle of...something in his eyes. He's up to something. Maybe I should stay on nice, solid ground. 

Except I dragged him to someplace he hates. This is the least I can do. "So, um, which boat we taking?" 

"Row boat. You know, gotta work out those arm muscles." He hands me a life jacket and lets go of me, smirking as he hurries towards the nearest boat. Honestly, Jack, a life jacket? I've done oceanographic archeology and he wants me to wear a life jacket? Sheesh. 

I put it on anyway, as it'll make him happy. 

~*()*~ 

"Okay, so we got Teal'c his...what is this again?" 

I shrug. To be honest, I'm not quite sure either. It looks like it could be a self-contained ecosystem. But what the Jaffa would want with that, I'm not sure. I was not going to fly with it, though. It looked like it could break. I'm having it shipped directly to the base. Carter will be upset Teal'c got his stuff first, but she'll live. Chocolate keeps well on flights. 

Jack's stopped at a shop again, this one with children's toys. I walk over and notice a boy in the window. I've seen him somewhere before...or someone that looks like him. One glance at Jack's face and I know. He looks like Charlie. I'll bet Jack wanted to bring his son out here at some point. And seeing this boy...it's bringing up painful memories. I have to distract him. I hate to see him in pain like this. 

My eyes wander around the promenade. In the background I hear barking, like a car alarm gone bad, only it's towards the water. "Hey Jack, what's that noise?" 

Jack rubs his eyes and furrows his brow. "What noise?" 

I raise an eyebrow in a very Teal'c-like manner. "How can you not hear that...that howling." 

Jack turns away from the window to look at me. Well, I've distracted him at least. "You mean the sea lions?" 

I blink. Sea lions? Let's see...I don't really recall ever having seeing one. I know they're at zoos, but the last time I went, I didn't see any. 

My blank look is obviously all Jack needs, because he starts walking towards the noise. "Come on, Spacemonkey. Let's go see the sea lions." 

Spacemonkey. One of my many nicknames. I actually think that's one of the better ones he's given me. "They have sea lions out here?" 

"Of course. This is their home when they're not migrating. Hell, even when they are." 

Jack looks better, but there's still a bit of a haunted look in his eyes. Seeing a Charlie look-alike is gonna haunt him for a while. I have to power walk to keep up with his pace. He's probably trying to force himself away as quickly as possible. I wish I could just hug him and tell him that it's okay, to hold his head to my chest while he cried out his pain. 

Yeah, like Jack O'Neill would ever cry. I should really stop dreaming and settle on someone else. But how can you do that when...when... "What on Earth is THAT thing?" I stop walking and stare at the giant...mammal, for lack of a better term. It must be at least two hundred pounds, maybe three. It's sitting up on two flippers and...barking. There are others, dozens of others, just lying there, well, one's shoving another off a...something. I can't really make out what's beneath them. 

"THAT, my dear Daniel, is a sea lion." Jack smirks and crosses his arms, leaning them on the railing of the pier. 

So that's a sea lion. Ugly thing. And not something I'd want to meet up with while swimming. I wonder why they call it a sea lion, though. It's color, perhaps. But still, it's hardly the traditional 'king' of the food chain in the area. Well, better ask Mr. Expert on the Bay Area. I ask Jack why they're called sea lions. 

Jack gives me a funny look, like I'm insane. I guess he's never really thought about it. "Daniel, we're on vacation. Stop thinking about where names come from or deciphering mysteries." Yep, he has NO clue why they're called that. "Just enjoy them for what they are." 

"Loud and obnoxious? Lazy?" Even the one that was barking has laid down to sleep. 

Jack sighs. Is that a disappointed look on his face? No, just irritated. I recognize it. I see it on almost every world we go to. Time to change tactics. There's a clock tower nearby. It's nearly three. Ghirardelli's nearby, we could get Carter's chocolate, some for ourselves, and make it back to the hotel in time for me to check out the anime stuff. 

"You know, Daniel, sometimes..." 

I get the idea. I'm so damned frustrating. "So, you said the chocolate place isn't far?" 

Jack scratches his head. Love that silver hair. He calls it gray, and blames them on me, but I think it's more silver in color. Gives him a dignified look. "Yeah, I guess. But the line's gonna be a mile long." 

Line? What line? 

~*()*~ 

Oh. THIS line. 

"And this isn't even for the restaurant. This is purely for the chocolate." Jack's eyes are shifting around. Hah, and he tells ME to relax on holiday. He's probably looking for areas people could attack from, best places to take cover in case a fight breaks out, the usual military spiel. But then it's so engrained in him, that I can't really blame him for doing it. 

I, however, am getting a bit impatient. This line is taking forever! We've moved maybe two feet since we arrived. Normally, I'm a very rational and calm man, but when it comes to coffee and chocolate, all of that goes out the window. Wonder if we could use our status as military personnel to move ahead to- 

Oh damn, here's another heart wrench. Damn it, why do they have to be so public! Two guys again. One's definitely older, but they look so in love sharing that ice cream. It's great that they can do this without care, but do they have to do it around me?! Or is this the universe's way of telling me to screw regulations and just go at it with O'Neill? If so, it's failing, miserably. Just because I see two guys doesn't mean I'll turn around and kiss one myself. Jack would kill me in a second. 

"Yo, Danny boy? You listening to me?" 

"Huh?" I look away from the couple, now sharing a bit of ice cream through a kiss, and face Jack. "I'm sorry, I was just-" 

"I said do you know what Carter wants? We're going in a second and there's no doubling back." 

"Oh, um, yeah." Damn, now I'm imagining myself and Jack sharing ice cream in such an intimate way. Actually, I can think of a more intimate way, but that'd really make the sheets sticky. Rubbing my forehead I pull out a folded up piece of paper and hand it to him. 

He steps back, holding his hands up. "Forget it. She asked you, not me. To me, chocolate is chocolate. I'm not gonna get it for screwing up her list." 

He's got a point. Sam would kill him if he bought the wrong type of chocolate. "Coward." I grin. 

"When it comes to Carter's obsessions, or even yours, everyone's a coward. We all still remember that morning you woke up without coffee and someone gave you instant." 

I wrinkle my noise at that. I didn't MEAN to throttle that airman, but really, was it too much to ask to get a decent cup of coffee? 

"We're all grateful Carter had that specialty blend in her lab." Jack walked into the candy shop and started scanning the shelves. "Though with that attitude, we should've sent you to wipe out a few of our enemies." 

I punch him, lightly. It's a running joke that Carter on PMS and me without coffee are the scariest things in the universe. I'm sure it's not true, though General Hammond's face when I told him off was pretty funny. 

Jack chuckles and picks up a bag of something. Chocolate, of course, but I didn't see what kind. Ah well, time to get to work. Let's see...a bag of Dark Chocolate...at least three of every flavor chocolate bar...this is gonna be a while. 

~*()*~ 

Jack's still in the shower. Perfect. I hide the DVD set of Evangelion (and the two movies! The hunt was good tonight) in my bag, the one with the books and my laptop. I was able to convince him that I should at least bring those with me for the plane. Of course, at the time I had forgotten how much I hate flying. Now the question is, how am I gonna sneak down to watch the movies later? 

Actually, I want to go to some of the discussion panels. One guy I met was really excited by some of them, and they sounded really informative, not to mention fun. I can't, though. Jack would figure it out immediately. But the movie room runs all night, and I really wanna see 'The Song of the Wind and Trees.' Well, it's not being shown until two in the morning. I'll just...sneak away in the middle of the night. Yeah. Jack'll be asleep, I'll go see the movie, and come back with him none the wiser. The perfect crime. 

Sitting on my bed, I open the curtains to the window and look at the city lights. Day two done, two more days to go. Hard to believe that in two days I've unwound so little, all because of the man sharing the room with me. Maybe I should just fess up. What harm could it do? Of course, one quick glance at the Zat in Jack's bag reminds me exactly how much harm it could do. To me, that is. That's not even bringing in our friendship, how we work as a team, any of that. 

But I can't keep this charade up forever. I love Jack, and he's distracting me more and more. I suppose I could quit the program, leave Jack and all of that and try and find someone else, but I don't think I could leave. I love my work there too much, not to mention how the government would probably force me to stay. I'm too valuable. 

Okay, so I tell him. When do I tell him? HOW do I tell him? Just casually say 'Jack, I know we've been friends a long time, but I'm bisexual and now I want to be with you on more intimate terms. Can you handle that?' Damnit! There's a time and place for everything! This city...this city feels like the right place, but what time? And again, how? It's not something you can just blurt out! 

"Hey, Spacemonkey. No thinking about work while we're here, remember?" 

My head snaps in the direction of his voice, and I know my jaw's dropped. He's just stepped out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist He's still damp, all of him. His hair, his molded chest, even his legs. I'm glad I'm resting my arms on a pillow, otherwise he might notice that another part of my anatomy is starting to rise. The guys think I like to shower alone because I'm shy. It's because I'm afraid they'll see my reaction to looking at Jack naked. He may be old, but damn is he sexy! 

"Daniel? You okay?" 

I blink. Focus, focus, pay attention. "Uh, yeah, yeah. Just...watching the city at night, that's all." Just tear your eyes from his gorgeous chest and go back to staring out the window. That's it. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Good...think calming thoughts. I hear Jack grunt an acknowledgment and start getting ready for bed. Shutting the curtains, I crawl between my sheets and face away from Jack's bed. Just have to remember to wake up on time... 

~*()*~ 

Huh, what? I'm in a bed? Wait, there's my bag. This is my bed? How'd I get here? I reach up and rub my eyes. The last thing I remember...the last thing...ah, I got up at one-thirty, got some clothes on, and snuck outta the room. Yeah. Jack was still asleep, so I took his key card. Then I went to the viewing room and...oh, I ended up with a seat in the back. Half the population in there had fallen asleep already. Others had alarms going for the movie. 

'The Song of the Wind and Trees.' It was a nice movie. Shortly after it started someone sat next to me, crowded me, even, but I couldn't see who because it was so dark. That's okay, I didn't mind until he, she? No, the hand was definitely a he, wrapped an arm around my shoulders. A complete stranger was flirting with me? Or maybe he was caught up in the film and did it on impulse. I decided to counter it by resting my head on his shoulder. Even if it wasn't my Colonel, it was nice to be held. 

Half of the movie I remember pretty well, but the other half is blurry. Oh geeze, I fell asleep. How pathetic. I can stay up till all hours when working on some obscure translation, but I sneak out to see one anime movie and I fall asleep halfway through. 

I don't remember the movie ending, but I do remember that it influenced my dreams. The movie ended in my dreams, and I turned to see who was next to me and...it was the Colonel. 

_"I didn't know you were into these kinds of movies."_

He was smiling. That's how I could tell it was a dream. He doesn't smile like that in real life. I nodded lazily, and he leaned down and planted a kiss, nothing harsh or possessive, just a gentle kiss that lasted a good couple minutes. I wonder if he kisses like that in real life. 

_"Why don't we head back to the room. We have a few things to talk about." _

__And he smiled again. Oh God how I wish that smile existed in real life, or at least was aimed at me rather than Carter or some other woman. 

We rode the elevator up silently, though we were holding hands. I think I was blushing. I didn't know you could blush in dreams. As we got into the room, though, he locked the door and kissed me again, this time more aggressively. This is what usually happens. We mean to talk, but Jack is a military man, and while literate in Shakespeare, he's a man of action, not words. Though it's happening more slowly this time. Usually he just pulls things off both of us and we get down and dirty. This time, though...he's taking care. 

_"Are you sure, Daniel? If you're not, we can stop."_

_"Gods, Jack, yes. I've wanted this for so long, but I knew that you...that you..."_

_"What we do on our own time is none of the military's damn business."_

__We kiss again, and within the next five minutes we're both naked and falling towards my bed. Again, few words are exchanged, but everything we feel, everything we want, is conveyed in the looks we give each other. Jack once said I had very expressive eyes. I never noticed that his were as well. 

We finished making love, and I, exhausted, fell asleep. But the last words I heard were _"I love you, Daniel Jackson."_

I sigh. It was such a wonderful dream, but that's all it was. Trying to push the memory aside, I begin thinking about how to get to Chinatown and roll over to look at Jack, who probably had my coffee. 

Instead, I end up with a face full of, well, face. Jack's face, to be precise. He's only half awake, but he tilts his head up to kiss me. "Mornin'." I feel a hand snake around my waist and pull me closer, holding my body, my nude body, against his. Wait...I sleep in a shirt and boxers. That means... 

It wasn't a dream. 

Jack came down and watched the movie, cuddled with me. 

He took me back to our room and we had sex. Passionate sex. 

And he loves me. He. Loves. Me. 

I don't know whether to scream or cry. I settle for simply staring at him with wide eyes, speechless. The man I've been longing for, the man who follows rules and regulations, the man who has a serious military career with everything to lose, is in bed with me. 

"Was I that bad?" He gives me a half humorous, half fearful look. 

I shake my head. It's all I CAN do. I can't speak. I'm so shocked, so...afraid, that I've lost all control over my voice. 

He sighs and pulls his other arm around, hugging me to his chest and stroking my hair. "We'll talk later, Spacemonkey. I promise." 

~*()*~ 

It turns out Jack got us tickets to see Alcatraz while at the Pier. I wondered why he vanished for that hour. We didn't get a chance to talk immediately. We had to get cleaned, dressed, and to the dock to catch the ship. Why he bought a morning ticket with how I am, I don't know. The drive over was quiet. A couple times I nearly voiced some questions, but each time I opened my mouth Jack would rest his hand on my knee. I took it as a sign that he didn't want to talk. That, and nearly going through a red light at a busy intersection. City driving is hell. And I thought the people on base were crazy drivers. 

The trip over and the tour was slightly interesting. I'd read the history a couple times, and seen 'The Great Escape,' so while the tour guide droned on, I spaced out and thought about what had happened last night, what I should ask Jack, trying to read him. He had his arm around my shoulder a couple times, and we held hands. I caught a couple disappointed glances from some of the women in the group. Guess this means I'm unavailable now. Not that I really had time to date before. 

The ride back I found myself alone on the front railing, watching us return to shore. I lost Jack getting back onto the boat, but I knew he was around somewhere, and like always, he would find me. He could find me anywhere, off world, on the base, even my days off he knew where to find me. I had always brushed it off as his protective instinct, the one he's developed for all three of us, Sam, Teal'c, and I. Maybe it was because he liked me. 

"There you are." Jack pushed me over slightly and joined me, watching the shoreline approach. His hands hung over the railing, and he was smiling again, though subtly. It's the smile that he usually has when we're off world. The one that we can see, but natives can't. "Penny for your thoughts." 

A penny? I don't think I could cover it all for a penny. My mind kind of keeps thinking. It never really stops, and it always thinks of various things at once. I think I know what he means though. "I, um...when'd you know?" 

"A while." Jack pulled his sunglasses off and looked at the lenses. "To be honest, I didn't understand it at first. As far as I knew, I was straight." 

I nod. I've heard the straight speech before. "But...why me?" It was common knowledge that every member of the SG-1 team was attractive, and sought after. Even Teal'c. Jack could've easily said yes to anyone, but he didn't, and chose me instead. 

"Why me?" He's smirking now, and glances at me with the corner of his eye. 

I frown, thinking he's mocking me a moment, then I realize he means why did I choose him. "I...guess there's a lot of reasons. Your looks is on that list, of course." 

He chuckles lightly. "I didn't think it was intelligence." 

"Actually...it's not like Sam's, or mine, but you have this, I don't know," my eyes search the surface of the water, watching as it's ripped apart by the speed of the boat. "You know Shakespeare, but you don't show off that you know, and you have a great strategic mind. You can think on the ball, and-" 

"Okay, okay. I get it. Intelligence was a factor." 

I close my eyes. "I just, felt something. Every now and then I get a...connection with a guy. It's hard to explain. I felt it with Sha're, and I felt it with you; not that they were the same!" I could feel him tense up at that comment. "I just want to...be with someone, I guess, but it has to be someone special, and I instinctively know who that is." I open my eyes and sneak a look at him. He's not frowning, but he's not smiling, either. I never understood it myself. I just clicked with certain people. With men they tend to be older. I wonder if the military found out about that history professor I dated. 

"Your eyes." 

I blink. "Huh?" Real smart, Daniel. You can speak twenty-eight languages, and that's the best you could come up with? 

Jack faces me and crosses his arms. "Your baby blues. The way they light up at every stupid thing we find out there, how innocent and naive they make you seem, how they fail to hide the sadness you feel every time you glance at me." 

My eyes (how ironic) widen as my mouth drops. You'd think after that morning I wouldn't be able to get shocked again, but really, I thought I was so discreet all those years. 

"What? You don't think I didn't notice you looking me over? It's my job to look out for you guys, as well as potential threats, Goa'uld or if you aren't feeling well." He rubs my hair, akin to a father ruffling his son's hair. 

Why did I think I could hide something from Jack? I guess to someone like him, I was pretty obvious. "So why-" 

"Hold on." He puts his hands in his pockets and nods forward. I look and realize the boat ride's over. I hope we can talk more in the car. 

He heads for the ramp. "Hope you're hungry for Chinese. I've got the address of a great restaurant from a friend of mine." 

Guess he thinks of everything, doesn't he. Well, I am hungry, and Chinatown is on my list of places to visit... 

~*()*~ 

We're back at the hotel room, now. We talked a bit more in the car, and over lunch. I came to realize that no matter what I asked, the fact was Jack was here, with me now, and he wanted to be more than friends. I shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. So I didn't, and he took me window shopping afterwards. Well, more like I dragged him from shop to shop. I bought a painting of an ancient Chinese Warlord. He thought it was ugly, but believe it or not, it'll fit perfectly in my apartment. 

We drove around for a while, and he pointed out some of his old hangouts. Apparently he had been stationed here for about two months. Near the military base, of course. And, what tour of San Francisco wouldn't be complete without the obligatory trip to see the Golden Gate Bridge? There's an old fort, the one that used to hold the Knox gold, at the base of the cliff side. We went there and toured the place, getting our pictures taken a couple times by Japanese tourists. What's with them, anyway? Still, one of them had a Polaroid, and he gave us a picture of Jack and I, arms around each other, with the Bridge behind us. Jack handed it to me, told me to keep it. He'd just lose it. 

Jack doesn't lose things. Never has, not even when we're off world. It's then I realized that we would be going back to work soon, and I began to worry. What if this was only something we would do while away from the base? I don't know if I could keep working 'in the closet,' as it were. He bought me some coffee, and I sipped it, all the way on the ride back to our hotel, pondering my worries silently. 

It's now approaching six, and we had just spent the last hour in bed doing everything but sleep. Jack may be old, but he has as much stamina as me, easy. In fact, I got the feeling he could go longer, but stopped because I was spent. Literally. I had no idea he was so skillful in the sheets. Now we're just lying in bed, spooned together, one arm around my waist, and his free hand stroking my hair. Despite how comfortable, how satisfied I am, I can't get rid of my worry. It's settled in the pit of my stomach, and just won't go away. 

Well, no time like the present to confront the truth. I roll over and face Jack. He kisses me, and he's got that sneaky look. He's made plans for us tonight. Well, they'll just have to be put on hold. I'm not going to feel any better until I ask him. "Jack..." 

"Hmm?" He props his head up on his arm. 

"What...happens when we get back? Do we just...return and act as if nothing has changed? Was this just for this weekend? Or...or...are you really willing to put your career on the line for me?" I push aside the thought that he shouldn't put his job in jeopardy for me or anyone. Every now and then, I've got to be selfish, to worry about me. 

"Well, you know the military policy of don't ask, don't tell. I'd like to point out, however, that you're a civilian." He runs the back of his hand down my cheek. "At work, yes, we'll have to be discreet. But during our downtimes, well," his brown eyes are sparkling with mischief, "it's not uncommon for you to stay a day or two." 

That's true. I've gone over and hung out almost every down time, and usually I remain because I'm too drunk, too tired, or both, to drive home, and we just unwind. "But your job-" 

"What I do with my spare time is my damn business. If I want to spend it with you, be it watching television or screwing you, that's my prerogative." 

I blush at that slightly. Well, at least he doesn't want to forget it, forget what's happened here. "So...you still want to date me?" 

"Hell yeah. Daniel, I love you. You don't think I'd say that to just any spacemonkey in my life, now do you?" He smirks. "Besides, there's a pool going around betting on who you'll hook up with. I think Sam was the one who bet on us." 

My jaw drops at that. "Sam?!" 

He laughs and sits up. "What? You're the one everyone wanted. You didn't really think the base personnel would just leave it be." 

"So...you know I'm-" 

"Bisexual. I think everyone knows, including the President." Jack stretched his arms. Damn. I've got to work out more in the gym. With him specifically. "Everyone's checked out thoroughly before entering the Stargate program. You're a civilian, Daniel, and you've proven yourself more manly, as it were, than most guys on the base. Saving the world tends to make people overlook such insignificant things as gender, sexual orientation, and race. In case you hadn't realized that." 

I must look like a fish. I know my mouth is opening and closing, and I sit up, hoping it'll get me thinking again, but my mind's drawn a blank. All those years I've kept it hidden, all those years in fear that someone would find out the truth, all for nothing! They knew! They fuckin' knew! 

"I scoffed at the bets where you hooked up with a guy. Everyone said you were bi, but I didn't believe it, or didn't want to, because if you were, it meant that you might actually...feel the same way I do. If I couldn't face my feelings, there was no way I could face yours." He rests his hands on my shoulders. "I checked a couple months ago, finally able to confront and understand how I felt. I couldn't believe it was true, but then I knew...I had to tell you, show you, somehow." He looked out the window. 

I followed his gaze, and realized what was going on. "You...set this up so you could tell me-" 

"The convention was surprising, but it offered an opportunity." His hand inched over and covered mine, squeezing it reassuringly. "So, I love you Daniel Jackson, and screw the world and what they think." 

"But your career-" 

"If you being bisexual had no influence, I doubt my being with you, openly or not, will change anything. We've saved the world, what, three times? Four? The world owes us, and back that up with what we offer the program, well, if they got rid of us, who'd Thor beam up to bug?" 

I roll my eyes at that, but I'm smiling, and I know there's a couple tears sliding down my cheeks. Damn. Well, might as well make the best of it. I lurch forward and hug him, clutching him for all he's worth. "Thank you, Jack. I--I love you, too." 

"I know Danny, I know." He holds me rubbing my back, and we stay like that for a few minutes. "So, you up to one more fundraiser? I, ah, couldn't get out of those." 

I groan. But from the sparkle I caught earlier, perhaps tonight's will be better than last time. 

~*()*~ 

City Hall again. We're both in tuxes once more. The place is gorgeous, still. This time it's dinner and dancing, along with the speeches. Fun. But at least I'm not worried about my feelings for Jack anymore. It's kinda nice that our first time officially together is here. I don't think I've ever seen a better place to have a quiet celebration, even if it's not for us. 

"Care to dance?" Jack isn't holding out his hand, or smiling really. I think he's nervous. He's kind of hunched over and his hands are in his pockets. "I mean, if you don't want to, that's okay." 

I flash him a grin and set my drink down, grabbing his arm and heading for the west room, where the dance floor is. It takes me a few minutes, but I eventually coax his hands out and we dance together. In all our time here, I didn't think Jack was nervous. Now I realize that his self-confidence was more for me. He's just as scared about this as I am. 

I rest my head on his shoulder as the music slows down. I don't care what happens, as long as I'm with my Colonel. They kick us out, and I'll get a job for the two of us. Hell, we'll move out here. Lord knows I've got enough savings to do it. Glancing up, though, I know Jack won't let anything happen to us. He'll give the SGC hell if they try and get rid of us. He knows how much I love my work there. I just hope he can keep his job there. 

~*()*~ 

"So, Teal'c, have you seen Daniel today?" 

Daniel paused outside Sam's lab. He was heading towards Jack's office to talk. He'd found that sometimes even Jack just liked to talk (though more often than not he just listened) to him about current events, his research, anything. It was comforting. 

"Yes. I also noticed O'Neill. They both appeared...elated." Daniel could almost imagine Teal'c's mouth quirking up at that statement. 

"You don't think that..." 

"I believe so." 

"Huh. Guess you can leave more than your heart in San Francisco." 

I smirked. Neither Jack or I are virgins, but I guess Jack is kinda one, me being his first guy and all. 

"What do you mean by that, Major Carter?" 

"Err..." 

I chuckle and continue my stroll, sticking my hands in my pockets. I'll have to remember to hit Sam up for that money she owes me, considering the jackpot she just won. 

I have my work, I have my Colonel, and I have my friends. Life is good. 

~*()*~ 

~*()*~ 

~*()*~ 

Author's Prattle: Well, here's my first Stargate fic (I've got two to three more planned). This is my second slash fic, and not nearly as long as my first. For those of you wondering why I've written this, I got the idea from Niteflite, who suggested I use my prom night location (San Francisco City Hall) to think up a fic. So, to her and another fanfic writer, here's your Graduation Present! Welcome to the real world! 

Now who wants to pop their dreams about the real world? Anyone? Anyone?  
Ah well. All the places mentioned in the fic that reside in San Francisco really are there. Not that I own any of those landmarks, museums, etc. Still, they're fun. And yes, if you suggested seeing certain landmarks in one day, you can reduce a native to laughing. However, having visited all the places above, I can assure you that everything happening per day could be done in a day, though someone who doesn't outrun parasitic aliens and die multiple times on a daily basis might find it tiring. 

I must apologize for the corny title, but I'm afraid it's all I could think of. I of course don't own the song it's derived from "I Left My Heart in San Francisco." Hope that didn't deter you from reading (well, if you're this far down the document, then it didn't). 

Disclaimer time. I don't own Stargate SG-1 or any of its characters. They belong to the SciFi channel, and a couple others I don't know. I also don't own any of the anime listed, or YaoiCon, which is a real anime convention held yearly here. I don't own any of the places in San Francisco, and yes, the hair exhibit was a real thing (I saw it...it was pretty...well, weird, but impressive). Sadly, it's moved to another museum, and the museum it was in is now a pile of rubble...for a while, anyway. 

Huh, so basically I just own the plot. That's a first for me. Well, that's it for Daniel/Jack for a while. The other fics might have Daniel with a guy, but not necessarily Jack. I hope to get them out soon...but we'll see. As always, reviews are welcome, and I hope you enjoyed! 


End file.
